I finally could accept the major i am going to live within 4 years ahead. After some arguments, thoughts, tears i accepted that maybe it is the way i build my future. My first choice was International Relations major, i had already planned about it since i was at tenth grade. My parents didn't seem to like it. Then i made the back up plan. My second plan was International Business Management. Until the last time, they didn't allow me to choose my first major. It doesn't mean that i gave up easily my dreams cause they forbid me. I think that, they may have something behind their opinion, and 4 years struggling without supports it is not something i have ever wanted.
One thing i am sure of why they didn't let me to choose that, because i could not answer when they asked me what i would do after graduated. My dream was to high for them.
I was spending this holiday crying sometimes, especially when i remember about that. Yet, sooner i realised that it could not change anything. The admission on joining Public University was already closed.
My potition was like : I am in a -only a second to take off- plane to New York, i can't go back and fly directly to Rome. The only choice is to enjoy my flight.
International Relations seems so interesting for me. I like the subject i will study in that major. I like economy too, i love everything about selling, maketing etc. Yet i am more attracted to culture, countries, social and humanities.
I once read in the bible that we should rely our future in Him. We may had already planned about that, yet thing which is going to happen is His plan, not ours. And He hath promised we shouldn't have worried, because we are safe in His hand.
Me now trying to enjoy His way for me. I also start to plan about what i am going to do in University to support my career after graduated. And about the International Relations, i think that i can study about that through books.
Things i learnt : Regret feeling is only sending you to a deeper valley. It makes you feel worse.
The time you spend for crying, is the time you lose on thinking about your dreams.
My plan may be good, but His plan is the best :)